Friday, August 29, 2008

Look at Me, I'm Raggedy Ann

While on vacation, my daughter was watching a Baby Einstein video. If you haven't been treated to one of these, let me explain what they are... Basically, someone found a lot of cute and colorful toys, and filmed them doing whatever it is they do. Rolling, hopping, sitting still. I firmly believe that they are actually watched more by kids who are stoned than kids who are teething, but I digress.

Anyway, one of the toys featured on this particular video was a Raggedy Ann doll. When Raggedy Ann's visage popped up on screen, The Girl yelled, "Mommy!" At first I thought she was simply drawing my attention to it, but then I realized that she thinks that I LOOK LIKE RAGGEDY ANN.

This is not the toy that most women would like to resemble. Barbie, Jem, maybe a Bratz doll if you're a hooker... But not Raggedy Freakin' Ann. I mean, look:

I shared my ire with the husband of one of my college roommates, and he looked at the image, then at me, then at the image, then at me, and said, "Well..."

I stopped him right there. Look, I KNOW that I look like R.A. I know it. I don't wear an apron or candy cane stockings, but I have a big moon face and a halo of hair that looks reddish at times. I KNOW THIS. But man, you don't want anyone to TELL you this.

My only consolation in this is that Super Ninja owned and loved a Raggedy Ann doll when he was little. So maybe, at an early age, he already knew his type. Don't know what that says about him, but it kinda makes me feel better about the whole thing.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008


You know what? You don't get to request your ex-wife as a Friend on Facebook. Maybe if you're Bruce Willis you do. But not you.

Do you see, people? Do you see why we need to have more than just a "friend" designation on Facebook? For your consideration:

1) Friend
2) Acquaintance
3) Work colleague
4) Met you one time, and I didn't like you then
5) No, no, a thousand times no

PS: I realize that this makes it sound like I have an ex-husband stashed somewhere in my past. I'm just incensed on behalf of a friend. A real friend, not one of those fictional friends that is really a cover for your own wackness.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

I'm Going to Bet Ed Robertson Still Doesn't Like Heights So Much

Often when the kids are in the car we'll listen to KidStuff on Sirius. Occasionally I'll flip over to the First Wave, and I'm delighted to report that the Boy really likes the Pretenders.

Anyway, I tell you this to explain why I am overly familiar with the Barenaked Ladies' kids' album, Snacktime. There's a song, "I Don't Like," for which Ed Robertson sings lead vocals. One of the lines of the song is "I don't like heights so much."

So, yeah, if you don't like heights so much, private planes are likely not the best idea.

While I"m at it: it's tough to tell your four-year-old the name of the band he's enjoying when the name of the band is "Barenaked Ladies."

Also while I"m at it: how do you think career children's performers feel about the novelty-ish children's albums released by successful pop groups? I kind of get the sense that members of these groups have children who have reached a certain age and would like to start schooling them on the awesomeness of music. But, they don't want to regale them with tunes about sex and drugs, so they turn to children's music. And they are dissatisfied and think, "Well, I could do better than that." Et voila: children's CDs by Barenaked Ladies, They Might Be Giants, Belle and Sebastian, etc.