Advice to Someone I Don't Talk to Anymore

Okay, I don't know if you read this blog, College-Roomate's-Ex (CRE, for brevity's sake). A couple of people in DC and Virgina show up in my site's stats (shout out to my readers!), but I can't go all SD6 and figure out if it's you. But you might, and if you do, there's something I wanted to bring up. I saw your MySpace page. Don't worry, I didn't cyberstalk you. Your avatar showed up on a mutual friend's MySpace page, and I'll admit it, I was curious. You and I spent much time together, so even though I can't really get past some of the things you said and did (or didn't do), I wanted to see where life is taking you.

A word of advice.

If you are going to go all Zoolander to beef up your online gallery, figure out how to use the timer on your digital camera. Or ask a friend to snap a few pics. Definitely don't stand in front of your bathroom mirror and take your own picture with your arm slightly out of frame so it (almost) doesn't look like you're holding the camera. (How do I know it's the bathroom mirror? The towel rack in back of you, tough guy.) It's the height of narcissistic toolishness.

This Is All Wrong

I may not know many things... Wait. Actually, I do know many things. And one of them is that this song...

does not exist. It's from a fan's MySpace page. Can't be a dedicated fan if s/he doesn't know the song is called "Enjoy the Silence." Perhaps it's a clever way around piracy laws? Oh, except the other two songs on the fan's page are correctly titled. Do you feel the waves of anger that my fourteen-year-old self is sending across space and time to this poseur?