Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Only in Maryland

Last night I stopped at the grocery store on the way home to pick up some Playtex Drop-in Liners. Since I am Super Mommy, I make sure the Girl has all of the advantages in life. Like, you know, being able to eat.

Anyway, there was a delightful aroma wafting throughout the store. Silly MCV, you might say, of course there was a delightful aroma. It's a grocery store. They sell food there. But this was a cooked-food smell, and I wasn't anywhere near the prepared food section of the store. It was making my stummy churn in anticipation. And when I turned the corner from the baby supply aisle to the seafood counter, I found the source of the deliciousness:

Yep, steamed shrimp. But these delicacies weren't hanging out behind the counter, waiting to be weighed up and sold to a salivating customer. Oh no, that'd be boring. The powers that be at my grocery store generously set out a platter for customers to sample.

Let's think on that. Seafood. Just hanging out on a table in the middle of a grocery store.

There are two very, very wrong things going on here. First, should seafood ever hang out without the benefit of refrigeration or constant heat? Probably not. Second, this is not a terribly convenient item to enjoy on-the-go. Lemme 'splain: Maryland steamed shrimp are coated in a thick seasoning, and are still in their shells. So if you want a sample, you would have to:

1) Hover over the sample tray;
2) Set down your basket of goods;
3) Peel the shrimp;
4) Toss the shell in the ratty paper grocery bag that the management thoughtfully placed near the platter ("Please place shrimp shells here" was scrawled on the side);
5) Pop the shrimpy goodness into your mouth;
6) Wipe your hands down with a dry paper towel.

Ewwwww, man, I'm shy about dipping my paw into a communal candy bowl, so I'm definitely not going to pluck up a shrimp from a platter that's been handled by the masses. Since the platter looked like it'd been decimated by angry Viking hordes, though, I'm guessing that I'm in the minority on this.

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